While browsing the net today, I was dismayed to read about yet another case of a rape hoax. The 18 year old Hofstra University student, Danmell Ndonye, accused four young men of gang raping her on September 13, 2009. However, she turned right around and recanted the whole sordid tale 3 days later only after the police found out that the incident had been recorded on video. Apparently, Ndonye appeared to eagerly enjoy the bathroom sex romp.
Reading about such cases always fills me with a swirling mix of sadness and anger. Not only has she caused these men and their families a considerable amount of grief and heartache, she tarnished their names in their own community. Forever, their names will be associated with a rape case despite the charges being dismissed. There's no doubt that some of them will have serious issues trusting women in the future. If I were one of them, I'd want signed contracts of consent before even thinking about getting to third base after that nightmare.
However, the real lasting damage will be for date rape awareness and the countless victims of this crime. False witnesses like Ndonye perpetuate the stereotype that women only cry rape because they have guilt about their sexual behaviour. What will happen the next time a woman comes forward with a rape claim at Hofstra University or anywhere else for that matter? Some will point at her case as a shining example of why date rape is a fantasy.
The tragic truth is that many date rape victims never step forward because they don't want to be categorized as just another tart with remorse after the beer wears off. They don't want their lives picked apart moment by moment to judge if their sexual purity is worthy enough. Indeed, they fear that no one will believe them.
I can only hope that Ndonye will be prosecuted by the State of New York for her false claims. Perhaps then, she will see that she has placed one more detrimental hurdle in the way of real date rape victims.
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